An 87 Year Old College Student Named Rose

The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn't already know.
 

I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder. I turned round to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me
with a smile that lit up her entire being.

She said, "Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I'm eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?"

I laughed and enthusiastically responded, "Of course you may!" and she gave me a giant squeeze.
 

"Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?" I asked.

She jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married, and have a couple of  kids..."

"No seriously." I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.

"I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting one!" she told me.

After class we walked to the student union building and shared a chocolate milkshake. We became instant friends. Every day for the next three months, we would leave class together and talk nonstop. I was always mesmerized listening to this "time machine" as she shared her wisdom and experience with me. 

Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went. She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living it up.  At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I'll never forget what she taught us. She was introduced and stepped up to the podium.

As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor. Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, "I'm sorry I'm so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I'll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell  you what I know."

As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, "We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing. There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success. You have to laugh and find humor every day. You've got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die.
 

We have so many people walking around who are dead and don't even know it! There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up.

If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don't do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old.

If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight.
 

Anybody can grow older. That doesn't take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change.
 

Have no regrets.

The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets."

She concluded her speech by courageously singing "The Rose." She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives.

At the year's end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago. One week after graduation Rose died  peacefully in her sleep.

Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be all you can possibly be .When you finish reading this, please send this peaceful word of advice to your friends and family, they'll really enjoy it!

These words have been passed along in loving memory of ROSE.

REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS
OPTIONAL.

We make a Living by what we get, We make a Life by what we give.

Source: http://bit.ly/11DPPnx
http://bit.ly/QsGCIt   

"The Rose"

Some say love, it is a river
That drowns the tender reed.
Some say love, it is a razor
That leaves your soul to bleed.
Some say love, it is a hunger,
An endless aching need.
I say love, it is a flower,
And you its only seed.

It's the heart afraid of breaking
That never learns to dance.
It's the dream afraid of waking
That never takes the chance.
It's the one who won't be taken,
Who cannot seem to give,
And the soul afraid of dyin'
That never learns to live.

When the night has been too lonely
And the road has been too long,
And you think that love is only
For the lucky and the strong,
Just remember in the winter
Far beneath the bitter snows
Lies the seed that with the sun's love
In the spring becomes the rose.

I am an IDOL

I AM AN IDOL

Before you go on with the entry, I would like to say:

Congrats to Regina Ivanova for winning INDONESIAN IDOL 2012 and to Kamasean Y. Matthews for being great contender to Regina. Both of you are the winner. Battle is not over yet, it is just started.

For those who didn't know who they are, both are grand finalist for INDONESIAN IDOL 2012.

Watch this YouTube video to listen to her voice:

I hope that you like what you heard. Regina won the title of INDONESIAN IDOL 2012.

Now it made me thought: WHAT IS IDOL? WHO IS IDOL?

If we see from the dictionary.com, then the meaning of IDOL will be:

"any person or thing regarded with blind admiration, adoration, or devotion: Madame Curie had been her childhood idol."

If you see the title, then you will conclude that I'm so full of myself stated: I AM AN IDOL.

Actually you are right, I think myself as an IDOL, not just a mere blind admiration/adoration/devotion but a full impact to others people life. As you can see from my previous entries, I believe that people who read them can at least gain something. With this in mind, I want to call myself an IDOL then. Not a celebrity or popular figure, but a mere boy with motivation to touch people's lives. No, I don't want to be like a famous public figure. i just want to share my thoughts. If you like it, it's good enough for me. If you disagree with me, I love to hear from you.

I personally believe that everyone should be an IDOL. Yes we ought to be a role model for others. Not saying that we are all mighty but knowing that we are imperfect and accept the nature of it. Like my entry: NOTHING IS PERFECT, I'm sorry to say you can't find any "perfect" things in the world. There must be flaw somewhere, though it's just a small little one. But what I like is, our effort to be perfect, to achieve what is IMPOSSIBLE and finally can find the answer of our questions. This is what I would like you to have in mind. We are a social being, affected by others. Hence we need to see, learn, and adapt from our environment. And this is for me an IDOL is being a good example (not necessarily perfect).

If we only care about outside appearance, then celebrity or famous people can be IDOL. But I don't think their appearance that defines IDOL. Remember my notes about Susan Boyle (What's wrong with SusanBoyle?). I would like to share the story of Regina now. She has been a cafe singer for some years. Her dream was to be next INDONESIAN IDOL or at least famous singer. She tried to go for the very first INDONESIAN IDOL. Unfortunately she didn't make it to finalist. She tried again the next year and again she failed. Maybe she was not that good at that time. Maybe her appearance affected the result or any other reasons. She tried 6 times to enter INDONESIAN IDOL. And again she got disappointed. But she tried one more time. Yes this year, she made it to be one of 12 finalists. And amazingly she won the title. After 6/7 years disappointment, she made it to the end and achieved a great result by winning the competition. This is for me an IDOL.

 For me this is what defines an IDOL, their effort and story. And I believe all of them have their own story to be told. Even people like Lady Gaga, Katy Perry, Madonna, or even Michael Jackson. They seem to enjoy world as celebrity but trust me there are some price to pay for that. Everything comes with no "free money". Hence I don't need to be famous/rich/glamour/handsome/celebrity to be an IDOL. I’m IDOL for myself and people around me. So I proudly say that I AM AN IDOL.

Can you be the next IDOL like me? The answer is ABSOLUTELY YES. You can be an IDOL and role model for others. A teacher is IDOL for students. Student will learn and take from their teacher. So be responsible teacher for them. You will DEFINITELY affect your student future. Parent is IDOL for their family. They are the first IDOL their children ever met. Unfortunately many of them didn't realize it. They act as they like and don't care about the children. They think money is the source of happiness. They run catching money and forget the family. Remember dad and mom, what you did will be the reflection of your child future and behaviour. It's just a simple example and all sort of life can be IDOL. Whether you are rich/poor, boos/employee, President/servant, religious/lay person, you can be one. It doesn't matter if you are a doctor/lawyer/teacher/housewife/trader/maid or anything else. What you need is a seed of "IDOL" in your heart. Every time you think, speak, and act, remember that you are an IDOL. Repeat the mantra "I AM AN IDOL". If you are ready to do it, do it right and responsibly.

You, yes you, the one reading this blog now. You are an IDOL for people around you even people you haven't met before. Like me, there is high possibility that I don't even know you but thanks for reading my blog. Thanks to spare your precious time to read my entry. And I hope and pray that you will get something out of my blog. I have faith in this. And I hope you can share and continue to be a blessing for others by starting your own blog for example. Or share motivational words through Facebook or Twitter or others social media. Share this entry if you feel benefited from it. There is no such thing as little action. The small step that you take will lead you to endless possibility. And be surprised to find out that you are an IDOL for someone else. BE AN IDOL.

~Wilson Wijaya, Lee/8 July 2012~

Question about LIFE: Have you???

Purpose of Life

If you follow my twitter account then you will know what I'm talking about.

Well for those who have no idea what I'm talking about well let me quote my twitter:

Question about life:1. Have you found joy in your life? 2. Have you brought joy to other people life? 3. Have you made meaning of your life?

~Wilson Wijaya, Lee/30 June 2012~

This tweet later  gained comment from one of my best friend:

Friend: Not at all. Any solution for this?

Me: I'm also on the way to find the answer. Everyone will surely have different answer. Depend on your own standard.

Then you will ask me, how the hell I get to ask these questions?

\This morning, 3AM to be exact, I watched The Bucket List on TV. The movie was really good and keep me reflecting on myself how far I have went. What will be on my bucket list to achieve before I "kick the bucket"? Where is the end of it and when will the end come?

There was conversation on movie on Greek paradise, to be able to pass the gate you have to answer the questions. Then what will be you answer, have you thought about it before? It's funny to know that most of the time we life our life as it is.

Well people say let it flow like river stream till it find the final end.

However to live my life to fullest I need to know what the purpose of my life. Sure enough I believe all of you also looking for the most final answer. What is the purpose of your life?

I think through this question we can narrow down our meditation about purpose life.

1. To find joy in our life.

2. To share the joy with others.

Hence we can make a meaningful life in our road to final end.

Either you believe in  God or not, heaven or hell, karma, etc the life is too good to be wasted. We only have one life; unless you believe in reincarnation. Though you believe that you will be born again, you will not repeat the same life. Each life is unique and different according to you.

I'm not a spiritual leader nor a wise old man. I don't really like to have a deep thought and meditation. However it struck me to think about my life. The thinking is so deep yet so engaging to keep me go deeper. In religion they tell you that purpose of life is to be together with your creator, to be free from all misery, and to find final rest and peace.

Knowing that it doesn't make my life can go in waste and doing nothing.

Living my life to fullest give more meaning by making a way to make a value of my life.

I won't teach you how to live you life, it's your choice to make.

But I would like to engage you in reflection and thinking how you want to fill your life.

If you choose to make a meaning in life, please do so.

If you do otherwise, I will not against it as long as you don't disturb others.

Answering the Question

Back to my friend comment, any solution to answer the question. No, I have no solution till now, you can follow Buddha, Jesus, Muhammad, or any other religious figure on earth. Else you can make your own spiritual guide on answering the question. I think the best answer is YOU, yes it depends on how YOU see and live it. I will try to help you answering the question through reflecting question. Let me break the explanation to each question:

1. Have you found joy in your life?

Before answering this question, please answer the following question in your heart. Give a thought. What is joy in your life? Having a lot of money? Having a big house? Having a big name and famous? So far what have you done to make it happen in your life? Education? Religion? Work? What defines the joy in your life? What values that effect you? Religion? Philosophy? Social norm?

Joy is a joy as long as it fill your heat. For me a joy is when a mother gives birth with love to her child. Joy is when a father dies to protect his child. Joy is when a child can live a happy life with their parent.

I may not be rich to found joy, may be my poor situation make me find joy and value in money.

I may not be clever to found joy, completing degree with my best effort is a joy for me.

I may not be religious to found joy, having a simple prayer in my room is joy of life.

As you can see the situation and condition limit the meaning of joy.

They define and make meaning of joy itself and back to YOU.

Hence the answer I suggest is WHAT DO YOU THINK?

2. Have you brought joy to other people life?

Well this is an arrogance question. I could say I have big impact for thousands or billions lives. If you see it like that, Jesus or Buddha or Muhammad have brought joys to their follower. Then until we can be like them, we have not brought any joy to other people. WRONG, I don't think so. Even just one people means that I have brought joy to him/her. Have you treated your spouse well? Have you loved them as yourself?

A teacher gives joy to student trough teaching. A mother gives joy to her child through love and care. A man gives joy to a woman though sharing of love and life. A simple smile can bring thousand joy to some people but at the same time can bring sadness. Everything has two side of coin in it, bad and good. Again it backs to situation and condition how it will turn out.

Money can bring joy to a family but at the same time can be a disaster. Love can bring joy to people but at the same time can hurt them deeply. To bring joy to people for me means to know what to offer to them. Simple conversation can be a joy. Your presence can be be a joy. A kiss can be a joy. Hence the answer I suggest is WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?

3. Have you made a meaning of your life?

If wasting your life is what you chose, then you have made meaning of it. If developing your talents made you happy, then you have made it. If having family is your sole purpose, then you have got it. A value comes from the owner how he/she values the value. If you see my past entry on Words about Working Bryan Dyson said:

Value has value only if its value is valued.

I think this the answer of this question. A meaning has a purpose and mean only if you give the meaning to it. Hence the answer I suggest is WHAT MEANING YOU GIVE MEANING TO IT?

Conclusion

A life is only life until you give meaning to it.

Whether you will succeed in your life or you will fail it, the decision is yours.

The question can be a guide to you to pass though the road of life.

You can make it as a mere question that pass you one day.

Or you can make it as obsession to fulfill your desire.

Else you can make it as guide and reference to move on.

I aint a teacher nor a philosopher, just a normal student of knowledge and wisdom.

However don't get blinded by the question till you forget what is truly important.

Stay still, stop, think, and reflect is good as long as you decide the next step.

If you stop at some point and  not moving on, I wish that is the point when you have found the answer.

If not then i suggest you to keep moving forward with new perspective.

Life is a choice whatever you chose please be responsible about it.

~Wilson Wijaya, Lee/30 June 2012~

Who is She? My Mother

Brief Career History

 The author interviewed Madam Lim, a single mother in her late 50. Her husband just passed away on May 2010. She runs a medium restaurant selling variance of food and a small bakery shop. She has four children, three daughters and one son. The oldest daughter is a dentist, currently working at family clinic. The second daughter is a medical student, currently serving as intern. The son is a university student, currently studying in the last year. The youngest daughter is an accountancy student, currently studying in second year.

Madam Lim is a Chinese descendant. She can speak Mandarin and some dialects. She was in food and beverage industry for almost 21 years. She started by helping her husband in running the business since her husband is illiterate. She, herself, was not degree holder. She only finished her Junior College. Due to her family financial background, she couldn’t pursue university degree. She started to work since young to help her poor family. She has nine siblings.

Madam Lim is brilliant and smart even though she couldn’t enjoy university life. She has sharp thinking, excellent communication skills, and good management skills. She picked those skills by herself through the experiences she has undergone. Madam Lim managed to expand her husband business from a small restaurant to a medium restaurant with strong customers’ loyalty. The restaurant is well known for their fast serving and delicious food. She also managed to open a small bakery shop, catered to birthday and wedding cake, along with the restaurant. On top of that she successfully entered her four children to university. Even some people didn’t believe that she could do that.

 She is also an entrepreneur. On May 2010, her husband passed away due to sudden heart attack. Then she has to manage the restaurant and the bakery shop alone. She struggled with the family economy to sustain her three children education cost. Due to the economy recession, the business didn’t go well. Luckily she got opportunity to open family dental clinic together with other relatives. She also joined her friends in other business projects. She is a good risk analyst, excellent predictor, and deep thinker.

The fairy tale is too good to be true. In fact she was diagnosed with diabetes type II, a genetic illness (Amy Adams, 2000). In spite of her illness she continued to fight and pursue her dream. She wanted to see all her children to be successful in the future by having university degree. She continued running the restaurant and bakery shop; and looking after other business. She is a strong-willed person.

A Letter to Dad

Last Sunday, we celebrated Father's Day.
For all fathers: Happy Father's Day, may you be a light and salt for the family.
For all children: Happy celebrating Father's Day, be a good child to your dad.
For all wives and mothers: Happy to see you with your loved one, may this will go to eternity.
And for those who don't have father: Happy to you who still have memory of your beloved father.

 And like me, who don't have the warm of father's hug anymore, we can only bring the memory of him.
Indeed we know that our father live forever in paradise.
Now I feel the pain of having no father around and envy them who still have complete family.
Happy are those whose family has both arm of father and mother.

This is just a letter that express my feeling towards my father.
It can be a reflection for you who miss your dad.
And also a reflection for you who still have dad to talk to and speak to.

I think I will do this more often to express my thought and feeling.
A letter to my dad who will never be able to read this.
A letter to my dad who is happy now in God's house.
A letter to my dad who will always pray for his son.

 

Dear Dad,

How are yo now? It's been a long time I see your face. Are you still healthy as before?
Are you happy there in God's house? Is that place better than home hence you leave first?
Don't you know how much mom cried near you asking you why you had to leave first?
Are you still that fat as before or have you slimmed down a bit?

Dad, I never imagined to say this, but I miss you now.
I really missed the time we had a conversation.
I really missed the time we spent time together as one family.
I really missed the time we had dinner together in our big table.

When you left us alone in silence, I asked God, why now? Why not later?
I never imagined to lose one of my parent so young when I still need them the most.
I don't care if my friend called me "spoiled brat".
I enjoy the time we had together, though you never speak a lot of words to me.
Though the memory I had are both smile and cry, happiness and sadness.
I always blame God for this, even till today.
Though I said to my self and friends I'm OK, I will never be OK.
I will never be the same anymore.
My heart was broken the moment I heard the news. I cried, I shouted, I went insane.

You left me before you saw me in my glory.
It was just one more year before I graduated, the moment you have been waiting for even till the last of your breathe. Why couldn't you wait for that moment? Why must God take you earlier?
People said that I didn't cry at all during your wake.
How could I cry if I really didn't understand what happened?
How could I make my mom sadder by crying with her?
How could I cry if I'm the only son in the family who has to be strong?
People just don't understand the pain that I felt that time.
I was pain that even tears couldn't wash it away.

But it was history. It was yesterday. It was my past part of my life story book.
I need to move on with my life and I believe you want me also to do the same.
Dad, did you know that now I have graduated?
Did you know how I wished you could see my graduation?
Did you know how I wanted to have picture taken with you in my robe?
How i wished you are seated there in the auditorium to see me in that stage.

I can't be a filial son to you.
Even now I was facing problem, I really don't know what to do.
Could you tell me what to do?
I can't meet my mom expectation and i believe it is also your expectation.
Have I failed you as a son?
Have I been a embarrassment to you?
I may not be the smartest student in my class.
I may not be the highest paid among my peers.
Surely I may not have  the proudest job among my friend
Do feel that I am a failure?
I wished you could talk and console me, how I want you to be with me, support me, and encourage me.
Let me be selfish this one time, dad I want to e just a child.
I don't want to grow up and be adult.
I just want to be with you like last time when I need not to worry  about anything at all.
Could I have that moment one more time and stay still?

I wish you all the best there dad. Enjoy your new life without pain and sadness.
Please watch me here with all your love.
Though in the silence, pray for your child to prove the world.
Let me be the son that make you proud the most.
Let me live your legacy here and to pay them who looked down on you.
I will make sure that they will pay every penny that they spent to mock you and mom.
I will defeat the world that has been hard on you and mom.
I will make sure your name will be remembered.

Please wait for me there. Till I come back to you, please be healthy and strong.
Protect our family and guard us with your shield.
Let me prove my self to you for once and all.

With love,

Your son

In Memoriam:

Me and My Dad

Nothing is PERFECT

Can you get 100% pure gold?
Can you get 100% pure kindness?
Can you get 100% pure love?

Some of you know the answer, NO.
I'm not a typical dreamer who dreams about finding a true love.
That's why all Disney story is very popular.
They sell dream to the children, a dream about perfect world, ideal word.

BUT, too bad, there is no such ideal/perfect world in our real world.
This is not a Disney world where everything ends up happily ever after.
A typical ending for all Disney classic story.
They change everything and fix it to our imagination of world.
A true love, a perfect world, where good conquer bad.

A pure gold can't stand for itself. It's too soft to be used.
That's why when you go to the shop you may be find 99% but not 100%.
A pure love can't stand for itself. It's too fragile, easily break.
That's why when you have it you need to take extra caution about it.
A true kindness can't stand for itself. It's too beautiful to be true.
That's why there is no trust you always wonder a true motive behind something.

Have you wondered why God never created something as perfect?
If you say human is prefect, there will be no dead.
If you say flower is perfect, there will be no fading.
If you say life is perfect, there will be no sadness and trouble.

People always argue that this will make us strong.
This will tamper us to be a tough man.
That's true, this imperfectness makes us a strong human.
This will shape us into a strong human being.

If all is perfect, then human is just lazy and usefulness creature.
If all is perfect, we are just a cry baby and never be an adult.
If all is perfect, I will not learn new thing every second I breath.

Because we are imperfect, we can know each other and be social individual.
We help each other to cover our own imperfectness or defect.
Like gold need other to make it strong, we can't stand by ourselves.

But don't depend too much on other people. That's another human mistake.
Since we are not perfect then let other to complete us, fill us.
It's wrong. I don't agree with that statement.
Since I'm not perfect, I need to pursue my perfectness.
Even though I know I'll never be perfect but I always try to be perfect.
Live my life in perfect mode.
Love like perfect love.
Be kind as no reason to do it.

We are just God's creation and result of social evolution.
Yes, it's true BUT it's not reason we can't be perfect.
Perfectness is just mere standard made by ourselves.

How do you know whether you are perfect or not?
You ask other to mark you.
You look through yourself and mark yourself.
You follow society requirement to be perfect.

My friend, live your life to the fullest.
Have no regret when the time comes.
Try everything while you can and never look back.
That's your standard of perfectness.

Departure to NEW Beginning

While watching Departure (Japanese movie), I make this note; 4.26 am.

I remember I made status note on facebook, stating:

"Nothing is last for forever, treasure every moment you have, cherish every time you get together, hold tight every thing you have NOW."

After watching the movie, it becomes clearer what it means to me.
Every human at one point will pass away and rest from all world things.
We're tired from all the problems, projects, tasks, and maybe life.
We want to sleep at peace and put everything behind.

Often we hear people say that death is beginning of a new journey.
It's not an end but a new starting point.
Like birth, death is also a turning point.
Death and life is like a piece of paper.
Side by side, face to face, both always walk together.

Isn't it funny?
When you die people will take care of you.
Other will decide the coffin, the burial place and ceremony, everything will be prepared for you.
When you die, you will not bring anything.
Just like you came to the world without bringing anything,
you will go back with the same way.
Do they spend hundreds or even thousands for the coffin?
Do they spend hundreds or even thousands for the burial?
Do they spend hundreds or even thousands for the grave?

Can you imagine when somebody leave you forever?
You can't touch, talk, hear, or even look him/her.
Let's say your mother, father, sister, brother, husband, or wife.
Until today, at this moment, I can't imagine I lose my special persons.
Even I know someday they will go and rest in peace.
I still need them all.

How about I leave them first?
Can they face it? Can I accept this fate?
Which one is the easiest choice, be the left one or be the person who leaves?
Can we choose? Do we know the answer?
Do we have any choice?

I think it'll be nice if I can be encoffineer.
I make sure my loved one grant eternal beauty.
I make sure my loved one get eternal rest peacefully.
I make sure my loved one give last memory to me.

Death is life.
Life is death.
When you live, live to the fullest.
Don't hold any regrets.
After you're tired, rest peacefully.
Your new beginning will start very soon after you wake up.