Price of Honesty

The Seed

A successful business man was growing old and knew it was time to chose a successor to take over the business. Instead of choosing one of his directors or his children, he decided to do something different.

He called all the young executives in his company together. "It is time for me to step down and choose the next CEO," he said. "I have decided to choose one of you."

The young executives were shocked, but the boss continued. "I am going to give each one of you a seed today - a very special seed. I want you to plant the seed, water it, and come back here one year from today with what you have grown from the seed I have given you. I will then judge the plants that you bring, and the one I choose will be the next CEO."

One man, named Jim, was there that day and he, like the others, received a seed.

He went home and excitedly, told his wife the story. She helped him get a pot, soil and compost and he planted the seed.

Every day, he would water it and watch to see if it had grown. After about three weeks, some of the other executives began to talk about their seeds and the plants that were beginning to grow. Jim kept checking his seed, but nothing ever grew.

Three weeks, four weeks, five weeks went by, still nothing. By now, others were talking about their plants, but Jim didn't have a plant and he felt like a failure.

Six months went by - still nothing in Jim's pot. He just knew he had killed his seed. Everyone else had trees and tall plants, but he had nothing. Jim didn't say anything to his colleagues, however. He just kept watering and fertilizing the soil - he so wanted the seed to grow.

A year finally went by and all the young executives of the company brought their plants to the CEO for inspection. Jim told his wife that he wasn't going to take an empty pot. But she asked him to be honest about what happened.

Jim felt sick at his stomach. It was going to be the most embarrassing moment of his life, but he knew his wife was right.

He took his empty pot to the board room. When Jim arrived, he was amazed at the variety of plants grown by the other executives. They were beautiful--in all shapes and sizes. Jim put his empty pot on the floor and many of his colleagues laughed. A few felt sorry for him!

When the CEO arrived, he surveyed the room and greeted his young executives.

Jim just tried to hide in the back.

"My, what great plants, trees, and flowers you have grown," said the CEO.

"Today one of you will be appointed the next CEO!"
All of a sudden, the CEO spotted Jim at the back of the room with his empty pot. He ordered the financial director to bring him to the front.

Jim was terrified. He thought, "The CEO knows I'm a failure! Maybe he will have me fired!"

When Jim got to the front, the CEO asked him what had happened to his seed. Jim told him the story.

 The CEO asked everyone to sit down except Jim. He looked at Jim, and then announced to the young executives, "Here is your next Chief Executive! His name is JIM!"

Jim couldn't believe it. Jim couldn't even grow his seed. How could he be the new CEO the others said?

Then the CEO said, "One year ago today, I gave everyone in this room a seed. I told you to take the seed, plant it, water it, and bring it back to me today. But I gave you all boiled seeds; they were dead - it was not possible for them to grow.

All of you, except Jim, have brought me trees and plants and flowers. "When you found that the seed would not grow, you substituted another seed for the one I gave you. Jim was the only one with the courage and honesty to bring me a pot with my seed in it. Therefore, he is the one who will be the new Chief Executive!"

If you plant honesty, you will reap trust. 

If you plant goodness, you will reap friends. 

If you plant humility, you will reap greatness. 

If you plant perseverance, you will reap contentment 

If you plant consideration, you will reap perspective. 

If you plant hard work, you will reap success. 

If you plant forgiveness, you will reap reconciliation. 

If you plant faith in Christ, you will reap a harvest. 

So, be careful what you plant now; it will determine what you will reap later. 

Two thousand years ago Paul wrote to the church at Galatia the same story but with fewer words, "What you sow, so shall you reap" (Gal. 6:7).

  ~Wilson Wijaya,Lee/18 January 2013~

SWOT Analysis

Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, and Threats (SWOT)

Have you ever heard about SWOT/SLOT analysis?

According to Wikipedia:

SWOT analysis is a strategic planning method used to evaluate Strengths, Weaknesses/Limitations, Opportunities, and Threats involved in a project or in a business venture. The technique is credited to Albert Humphrey, who led a convention at the Stanford Research Institute (now SRI International) in 1960s and 1970s using data from Fortune 500 companies.

I heard about this for the first time when I learned about Principal of Marketing. It gives me a new thought about how to approach different situation using this analysis. Actually we can use SWOT analysis in our daily problem, from looking for a job, venturing to new business, launching a new product, even looking a life-partner (yeah seriously you can use this method :p). I would like to elaborate on this method on how to use it to our different situation and using my own example to support the explanation. I hope this will help you in understanding the method and apply it in your own problem.

Before moving to each application, it's better to understand each element in SWOT analysis. First the method is divided into two elements, internal and external. Internal means the characteristic of the subject while external means the outside forces that affect the subject. Let's start one by one:

1. Strengths

One of the internal dimension, a characteristic of the subject that gives the advantage over the others. It's like your power to strike the enemy, the weapon used in war. Our strengths could be our value, talent, education, knowledge, family, capital, friend, etc. Basically it could be anything that gives us competitive advantage over the other. It is a differentiation factor that make us better than the rest. It's like our Unique Selling Point. Think about the competitor/enemy, what do you have better than them? However don't be too subjective hence make the judgment not fair and balance. Don't be unfair unless you want to plan yourself to fail. Be objective, realistic, and fair. List down all your strengths.

2. Weaknesses/Limitations

Well everything have two side of coins, nobody is perfect. If there is power, there will be weakness. While focusing on power and strength, we need to know our weaknesses well. Don't let people to pick it up from us. We need to try to understand ourselves better than others. What could you improve? What are limitations that you face? Don't say you have none, everyone will have one. Again be realistic and objective. However don't underestimate or mark yourself down.

The first two elements help us to reflect on ourselves. Taking a mirror in front of us and describe what you see there. By knowing ourselves, we can better understand others. According to Sun Tzu on The Art of War (from Wikipedia):

知己知彼，百戰不殆。

If you know both yourself and your enemy, you can win numerous (literally, "a hundred") battles without jeopardy.

 3. Opportunities

It is a external dimension to look around which give us advantage and more value. Come in a form external chances to improve performance in the environment.  Changes that happen in society can give you added value, from example social media booming. If we can use it right, it can be a weapon for us to hold our ground. List all changes happening in society that you can use for your advantage. Don't limit yourself, be wide and imaginative. Think globally and internationally.

4. Threats

Again everything comes in good and bad effect. While opportunities give more advantage, threats give us trouble and headache :p. It could be the external obstacles; such as laws, regulations, technology, etc.

Everything is linked together and can turn to one another. Our weakness can be an opportunity for us. We should think how to make it our strengths by mitigate/solving the problem. Again threat can be another opportunity for us to think big. If we let our guard down, our strength can backfire us. Hence we need to always think and analyze fairly, objectively, and equally. Remember each element is connected together.

After having so much explanation and theory, let's use them in our real life problem and application. I will try use 3 different situation to apply SWOT analysis; looking for job, launching product, and looking for lifetime partner. Let's start from the first:

1. Looking For Job

Objective:  to prepare ourselves in this tight competition on getting job.

For this we need to prepare ourselves to get ready for interview. Get ready to be asked about our strengths and weaknesses, hence to prepare beforehand is a good practice. Let's see how to apply SWOT analysis:

Strengths: Our education background, personal skills, work experiences, language, leadership, organization involvement, group discussion, etc. Asked ourselves what makes us different?

Weaknesses: What could we improve? What should we avoid? What other factors hinder yourself from others? For example lack of time management, heavy laziness, over pride, etc.

Opportunities: What are current booming industry? Easy access for company information and job online, network and connection with industry player, etc.

Threats: Other students with higher grade, competitive market, government regulation, company policy on hiring, etc.

We can ask and think about some of these pointers. Be prepared and get ready, be different like a  red rose in the middle of white ones. Show your self above and higher than other. Remember to turn your weakness and threat to your opportunity to improve and get better.

2. Launching A New Product

Objective: to launch a new product into market.

Strengths: What is Unique Selling Point of our product? What makes it better than our competitor; the taste, the shape, the color, the quality, etc? What makes is stand out from other its kind product?

Weaknesses: What are the bad side of our product? What makes us lesser value than our competitor; the higher price, small production, small capital, lack of manpower, etc?

Opportunities: How to use current social media in promoting our product; Facebook page, Twitter, web promotion, etc? Can we make an event to promote this product?

Threats: How will our competitor react to our product? Is there any substitute to our product, especially cheaper one?

We need a deeper analysis to make sure the product will be a great success. We need to combine with deep market research, market test, business plan, execution plan, market test, prototype, etc. SWOT analysis is just a small part to give early understanding about our new product.

3. Looking for lifetime partner

Objective: to find special someone whom we will spend our life with.

Strengths: What is our higher value; higher education, high social status, our family wealth, our personality, etc? What gives us the upper hand than other man/woman?

Weaknesses: What can turn us down, our boring talk, over protective, heavy jealousy, too talkative, stingy, etc? What could we improve on our bad side?

Opportunities: Having taller height could give more advantage, especially for man. Joining different club in school or university will widen our social network. Attending mix school also will help us in make social connection. What other opportunity that will help you in finding the right one? Thousands Facebook friends perhaps :) 

Threats: Better man/woman around with higher social status or wealth. Different religion may also limit our potential lifetime partner. And number of people with different "preference" may also affect your future partner.

It's how you "market" ourselves; either looking for job or future lifetime partner. But don't oversell yourself. Again remember to keep your analysis fairly, objectively, and equally. Don't underestimate and mark yourself down also. Everything must be balance on the scale. At the end SWOT analysis is just a method to help you to prepare yourself. However the result will depend on your execution. How well you make the thing happen will determine your  result. Be positive thinker and hard worker. A method is just a way to achieve the goal but the process will determine the far you will go. Be prepared but also be surprised.

~Wilson Wijaya, Lee/21 July 2012~

Golden Rule; Still Applicable?

The Golden Rule

From the Wikipedia, the GOLDEN RULE or ethic reciprocity is either of the following:

• (Positive form): One should treat others as one would like others to treat oneself.
• (Negative/prohibitive form, also called the Silver Rule): One should not treat others in ways that one would not like to be treated.

And in the Bible, the Greatest Commandment stated by Jesus, said (Luke10:25-28):

²⁵And one day an authority on the law stood up to put Jesus to the test. “Teacher,” he asked, “what must I do to receive eternal life?”

²⁶What is written in the Law?” Jesus replied. “How do you understand it?” ²⁷He answered, “ ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul. Love him with all your strength and with all your mind.’(Deuteronomy 6:5) And, ‘Love your neighbor as you love yourself.’ ”

²⁸“You have answered correctly,” Jesus replied. “Do that, and you will live.”.

So all great teachers/philosophers/thinker/spiritual leaders/guru taught all almost the same thing, DO GOOD TO OTHERS, DON'T HURT OTHER AND YOU WILL GET NO HURT.

I would like to ask you this question: Do you agree with this view? Have you applied it in your life? Some will say that indeed they believe in it and that's the reason they are doing good deeds.

Others will say they never mind about it. They just don't give a damn and live they life as they would. There are so many critics arise from this rules, stating that it doesn't always follow the rule.

As far as we concern, didn't rule make to be disobeyed? Is there such thing as KARMA.

Let's discuss about this in my entry today. I found it interesting to talk about. Before that please kindly read the quotes on the picture above. Give a thought for a minute.

When I see my life it always follow the standard pattern, life is so unexpected.

I gave hard effort in my difficult subject but I ended up getting low mark.

I gave helps to my friends who are in most need but when I faced problem there no one there to listen.

I gave much donation to society but my family was scattered.

Maybe these some examples that you faced currently and made you have the conclusion:

THE RULE DON'T EXIST. 

It just don't work for me, what have I done to end up in this situation? Didn't I follow the rule?

You are not the only one facing this problem, I and thousands more people face the same issue.

Sometimes it is not right to uphold any faith and believe when we are facing the problem.

Should we give up on humanity then? Should we just break free and do anything?

My friend hold on for a moment. Close your eyes, take a deep breathe, and relax.

Life is not simple and don't follow any 'rules'. It's a surprise moment for you.

Just because one person hurt you doesn't mean the whole world go against you.

Don't give up your life just because one person who doesn't understand you at all.

Your life is much more worthy than that. Yes this person failed you, so what, move on with your life.

Just have a thought that one day he will pay price double than what person did to you.

For example your partner cheated on you. You loved him/her so much till the point you will give up your life for that person. However you found out that this person backstab you. Much worst, the person did it with your super duper best friend. Then you feel that you have lost everything. No one can be trusted. You end up hating others and yourself. Then reckless decision you made is to end your life. You gave everything but why this happened to you. Don't you deserve something much better? YES, you deserve the BEST. That's why life turns you to this pitch black condition. Life is the hardest teacher, he use our fear to stroke us. It feels more painful than rod stick. But it will not kill you, instead it will strengthen you. Don't take my words, think about past experience that you had. If you are currently having the problem, close your eyes and take the bitter medicine as it is. One day you will get heal and thanking the 'drug'.

Doing a good deed while expecting others to do the same will lead you nowhere. Trust me it won't gain you everything. But doing good deed for the sake of it and yourself will give you inner peace. Giving a bread to a hungry homeless beggar and receive a warm smile and thanking for him, this is just a heavenly moment. Don't your heart get flustered when doing so much more than meeting your boyfriend/girlfriend.  I think this is why we all want to do good, regardless of our religion doctrine. It's just our calling deep inside, a fulfillment for our heart most desire. I remembered the conversation between a murderer and detective on Detective Conan manga when the detective helps the murderer from falling:

Murderer: Why do you help me, don't you know who I am?

Detective: I don't know your reason for killing but do you need a reason to help others?

 I think all of us need to reflect on this: DO WE NEED A REASON TO HELP OTHERS?

Life will not kill you if you don't let your guard down. Remember what Kelly Clarkson said: What doesn't kill kill you make you stronger (listen to the music below). It's not the end of everything though it seems so dark and nowhere to go. This is the hope of humanity, the reason of doing good just because of nothing. Don't expect back and do give wholeheartedly. Maybe we can say LOVE is the reason behind. Golden Rule will just go around as it is and it still will be the big reason of what people doing now. Whatever the cause, the important thing is the mean and process. Though you get back what you give, think that life pay back its debt to you. If life pay you back double, just take it a bonus and reason to give more to others. Don't you think the world will go slightly better in time?

Make a decision for you now. Either you follow the rule or not, believe or not, you have no reason to do good deeds. Just do it like Nike said on their shoes logo. But do think about it cause sometimes good deed can turn out to be bad result. For example you want to help poor by giving donation, but it turns out that the donation go to personal wealth. Don't take hard on it. I know it will be difficult. It's money we are talking about, the hard earn money. How come this people cheat you for personal gain? Well I don't know the reason but I believe you will get back much more for your good intention. As long as you keep the good intention and trust to other, life will not disappoint you twice (or may be three times :p). Follow your heart inner desire and calling. At the end the payment due will come to you either in good way or bad way. Let the life take its own course.

~Wilson Wijaya,Lee/12 July 2012~

Question about LIFE: Have you???

Purpose of Life

If you follow my twitter account then you will know what I'm talking about.

Well for those who have no idea what I'm talking about well let me quote my twitter:

Question about life:1. Have you found joy in your life? 2. Have you brought joy to other people life? 3. Have you made meaning of your life?

~Wilson Wijaya, Lee/30 June 2012~

This tweet later  gained comment from one of my best friend:

Friend: Not at all. Any solution for this?

Me: I'm also on the way to find the answer. Everyone will surely have different answer. Depend on your own standard.

Then you will ask me, how the hell I get to ask these questions?

\This morning, 3AM to be exact, I watched The Bucket List on TV. The movie was really good and keep me reflecting on myself how far I have went. What will be on my bucket list to achieve before I "kick the bucket"? Where is the end of it and when will the end come?

There was conversation on movie on Greek paradise, to be able to pass the gate you have to answer the questions. Then what will be you answer, have you thought about it before? It's funny to know that most of the time we life our life as it is.

Well people say let it flow like river stream till it find the final end.

However to live my life to fullest I need to know what the purpose of my life. Sure enough I believe all of you also looking for the most final answer. What is the purpose of your life?

I think through this question we can narrow down our meditation about purpose life.

1. To find joy in our life.

2. To share the joy with others.

Hence we can make a meaningful life in our road to final end.

Either you believe in  God or not, heaven or hell, karma, etc the life is too good to be wasted. We only have one life; unless you believe in reincarnation. Though you believe that you will be born again, you will not repeat the same life. Each life is unique and different according to you.

I'm not a spiritual leader nor a wise old man. I don't really like to have a deep thought and meditation. However it struck me to think about my life. The thinking is so deep yet so engaging to keep me go deeper. In religion they tell you that purpose of life is to be together with your creator, to be free from all misery, and to find final rest and peace.

Knowing that it doesn't make my life can go in waste and doing nothing.

Living my life to fullest give more meaning by making a way to make a value of my life.

I won't teach you how to live you life, it's your choice to make.

But I would like to engage you in reflection and thinking how you want to fill your life.

If you choose to make a meaning in life, please do so.

If you do otherwise, I will not against it as long as you don't disturb others.

Answering the Question

Back to my friend comment, any solution to answer the question. No, I have no solution till now, you can follow Buddha, Jesus, Muhammad, or any other religious figure on earth. Else you can make your own spiritual guide on answering the question. I think the best answer is YOU, yes it depends on how YOU see and live it. I will try to help you answering the question through reflecting question. Let me break the explanation to each question:

1. Have you found joy in your life?

Before answering this question, please answer the following question in your heart. Give a thought. What is joy in your life? Having a lot of money? Having a big house? Having a big name and famous? So far what have you done to make it happen in your life? Education? Religion? Work? What defines the joy in your life? What values that effect you? Religion? Philosophy? Social norm?

Joy is a joy as long as it fill your heat. For me a joy is when a mother gives birth with love to her child. Joy is when a father dies to protect his child. Joy is when a child can live a happy life with their parent.

I may not be rich to found joy, may be my poor situation make me find joy and value in money.

I may not be clever to found joy, completing degree with my best effort is a joy for me.

I may not be religious to found joy, having a simple prayer in my room is joy of life.

As you can see the situation and condition limit the meaning of joy.

They define and make meaning of joy itself and back to YOU.

Hence the answer I suggest is WHAT DO YOU THINK?

2. Have you brought joy to other people life?

Well this is an arrogance question. I could say I have big impact for thousands or billions lives. If you see it like that, Jesus or Buddha or Muhammad have brought joys to their follower. Then until we can be like them, we have not brought any joy to other people. WRONG, I don't think so. Even just one people means that I have brought joy to him/her. Have you treated your spouse well? Have you loved them as yourself?

A teacher gives joy to student trough teaching. A mother gives joy to her child through love and care. A man gives joy to a woman though sharing of love and life. A simple smile can bring thousand joy to some people but at the same time can bring sadness. Everything has two side of coin in it, bad and good. Again it backs to situation and condition how it will turn out.

Money can bring joy to a family but at the same time can be a disaster. Love can bring joy to people but at the same time can hurt them deeply. To bring joy to people for me means to know what to offer to them. Simple conversation can be a joy. Your presence can be be a joy. A kiss can be a joy. Hence the answer I suggest is WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?

3. Have you made a meaning of your life?

If wasting your life is what you chose, then you have made meaning of it. If developing your talents made you happy, then you have made it. If having family is your sole purpose, then you have got it. A value comes from the owner how he/she values the value. If you see my past entry on Words about Working Bryan Dyson said:

Value has value only if its value is valued.

I think this the answer of this question. A meaning has a purpose and mean only if you give the meaning to it. Hence the answer I suggest is WHAT MEANING YOU GIVE MEANING TO IT?

Conclusion

A life is only life until you give meaning to it.

Whether you will succeed in your life or you will fail it, the decision is yours.

The question can be a guide to you to pass though the road of life.

You can make it as a mere question that pass you one day.

Or you can make it as obsession to fulfill your desire.

Else you can make it as guide and reference to move on.

I aint a teacher nor a philosopher, just a normal student of knowledge and wisdom.

However don't get blinded by the question till you forget what is truly important.

Stay still, stop, think, and reflect is good as long as you decide the next step.

If you stop at some point and  not moving on, I wish that is the point when you have found the answer.

If not then i suggest you to keep moving forward with new perspective.

Life is a choice whatever you chose please be responsible about it.

~Wilson Wijaya, Lee/30 June 2012~

Who is She? My Mother

Brief Career History

 The author interviewed Madam Lim, a single mother in her late 50. Her husband just passed away on May 2010. She runs a medium restaurant selling variance of food and a small bakery shop. She has four children, three daughters and one son. The oldest daughter is a dentist, currently working at family clinic. The second daughter is a medical student, currently serving as intern. The son is a university student, currently studying in the last year. The youngest daughter is an accountancy student, currently studying in second year.

Madam Lim is a Chinese descendant. She can speak Mandarin and some dialects. She was in food and beverage industry for almost 21 years. She started by helping her husband in running the business since her husband is illiterate. She, herself, was not degree holder. She only finished her Junior College. Due to her family financial background, she couldn’t pursue university degree. She started to work since young to help her poor family. She has nine siblings.

Madam Lim is brilliant and smart even though she couldn’t enjoy university life. She has sharp thinking, excellent communication skills, and good management skills. She picked those skills by herself through the experiences she has undergone. Madam Lim managed to expand her husband business from a small restaurant to a medium restaurant with strong customers’ loyalty. The restaurant is well known for their fast serving and delicious food. She also managed to open a small bakery shop, catered to birthday and wedding cake, along with the restaurant. On top of that she successfully entered her four children to university. Even some people didn’t believe that she could do that.

 She is also an entrepreneur. On May 2010, her husband passed away due to sudden heart attack. Then she has to manage the restaurant and the bakery shop alone. She struggled with the family economy to sustain her three children education cost. Due to the economy recession, the business didn’t go well. Luckily she got opportunity to open family dental clinic together with other relatives. She also joined her friends in other business projects. She is a good risk analyst, excellent predictor, and deep thinker.

The fairy tale is too good to be true. In fact she was diagnosed with diabetes type II, a genetic illness (Amy Adams, 2000). In spite of her illness she continued to fight and pursue her dream. She wanted to see all her children to be successful in the future by having university degree. She continued running the restaurant and bakery shop; and looking after other business. She is a strong-willed person.

A Letter to Dad

Last Sunday, we celebrated Father's Day.
For all fathers: Happy Father's Day, may you be a light and salt for the family.
For all children: Happy celebrating Father's Day, be a good child to your dad.
For all wives and mothers: Happy to see you with your loved one, may this will go to eternity.
And for those who don't have father: Happy to you who still have memory of your beloved father.

 And like me, who don't have the warm of father's hug anymore, we can only bring the memory of him.
Indeed we know that our father live forever in paradise.
Now I feel the pain of having no father around and envy them who still have complete family.
Happy are those whose family has both arm of father and mother.

This is just a letter that express my feeling towards my father.
It can be a reflection for you who miss your dad.
And also a reflection for you who still have dad to talk to and speak to.

I think I will do this more often to express my thought and feeling.
A letter to my dad who will never be able to read this.
A letter to my dad who is happy now in God's house.
A letter to my dad who will always pray for his son.

 

Dear Dad,

How are yo now? It's been a long time I see your face. Are you still healthy as before?
Are you happy there in God's house? Is that place better than home hence you leave first?
Don't you know how much mom cried near you asking you why you had to leave first?
Are you still that fat as before or have you slimmed down a bit?

Dad, I never imagined to say this, but I miss you now.
I really missed the time we had a conversation.
I really missed the time we spent time together as one family.
I really missed the time we had dinner together in our big table.

When you left us alone in silence, I asked God, why now? Why not later?
I never imagined to lose one of my parent so young when I still need them the most.
I don't care if my friend called me "spoiled brat".
I enjoy the time we had together, though you never speak a lot of words to me.
Though the memory I had are both smile and cry, happiness and sadness.
I always blame God for this, even till today.
Though I said to my self and friends I'm OK, I will never be OK.
I will never be the same anymore.
My heart was broken the moment I heard the news. I cried, I shouted, I went insane.

You left me before you saw me in my glory.
It was just one more year before I graduated, the moment you have been waiting for even till the last of your breathe. Why couldn't you wait for that moment? Why must God take you earlier?
People said that I didn't cry at all during your wake.
How could I cry if I really didn't understand what happened?
How could I make my mom sadder by crying with her?
How could I cry if I'm the only son in the family who has to be strong?
People just don't understand the pain that I felt that time.
I was pain that even tears couldn't wash it away.

But it was history. It was yesterday. It was my past part of my life story book.
I need to move on with my life and I believe you want me also to do the same.
Dad, did you know that now I have graduated?
Did you know how I wished you could see my graduation?
Did you know how I wanted to have picture taken with you in my robe?
How i wished you are seated there in the auditorium to see me in that stage.

I can't be a filial son to you.
Even now I was facing problem, I really don't know what to do.
Could you tell me what to do?
I can't meet my mom expectation and i believe it is also your expectation.
Have I failed you as a son?
Have I been a embarrassment to you?
I may not be the smartest student in my class.
I may not be the highest paid among my peers.
Surely I may not have  the proudest job among my friend
Do feel that I am a failure?
I wished you could talk and console me, how I want you to be with me, support me, and encourage me.
Let me be selfish this one time, dad I want to e just a child.
I don't want to grow up and be adult.
I just want to be with you like last time when I need not to worry  about anything at all.
Could I have that moment one more time and stay still?

I wish you all the best there dad. Enjoy your new life without pain and sadness.
Please watch me here with all your love.
Though in the silence, pray for your child to prove the world.
Let me be the son that make you proud the most.
Let me live your legacy here and to pay them who looked down on you.
I will make sure that they will pay every penny that they spent to mock you and mom.
I will defeat the world that has been hard on you and mom.
I will make sure your name will be remembered.

Please wait for me there. Till I come back to you, please be healthy and strong.
Protect our family and guard us with your shield.
Let me prove my self to you for once and all.

With love,

Your son

In Memoriam:

Me and My Dad

[Faith] Commitment = Marriage

In this rapid, fast, and dynamic environment, commitment becomes the very first issue in anything. It is applicable to our study life, club/organization, project, assignment, and even service to God. Let’s face this, we are NTU student, busy people, doing a lot of things, and thinking 24 hours a day is far from enough. On top of this, we still need to serve God in our community, let it be core team, executive committee, or church helper. All of these force us to have highly committed attitude so that we can handle it well. Now let us focus only in service to God, core team in our context. Are you an ex-core team? Or are you in core team? I believe we are quite familiar with the words; SPIRITUAL COMMITMENTS. Before I start, let me ask you this question,

“Do you think it is important to have SPIRITUAL COMMITMENTS as core team member?”
“If I’m not in the core team anymore, should I just quit this SPIRITUAL COMMITMENTS?”

These questions may be wandering in your mind, I hope so. If not, then I bring you the questions.

Let’s recall our mind, what are the SPIRITUAL COMMITMENTS?

1. Eucharist
2. Bible reading and reflection
3. Prayer life
4. Confession
5. Devotion to Mother Mary

It’s simple, sweet, and nicely put. But what is the meaning behind it actually? Can I just skip it? Do I need to do all? May I just do one at a time?

Commitment is equal to marriage. In marriage vow, the husband unites himself to the wife and vice versa. They are no longer two but become one. It’s the same thing when we are baptized. We no longer belong to ourselves but to the Church and HIM personally. We unite ourselves as body of Christ. In this union “take” and “give” action must take place. Same as husband and wife, the husband can’t give all the time and the wife can’t always take from the husband. Christ will always give us His blessing and love; we can take it freely anytime and anywhere. However we also need to give back to God and His people.

Do you think if we don’t do any of five commitments the glory of God will fall? NO. It won’t change anything. God will always be God. That’s why He is God and not like others King. We do those because our longing to Him and our love to Him. Deep inside our heart we are longing to be one with Him, our creator, you and me. All these five are only the path to bring us closer to Him and make Him known to us.

Hence whether we are in core team or not, as long as we are Catholic, the follower of Christ, we should uphold these commitments in daily life.

But nowadays many people didn’t realize that they need these paths. We are too busy and concerned with our earthly stuffs. I don’t say that we can’t do anything else. However we need to set time for these in our super busy and tight schedule. Let me explain why we do need to pursue this in daily life.

1. Eucharist

First and foremost is Eucharist. It’s not just the celebration. Moreover it’s about receiving the real body and blood of Christ in our human body. The real presence of Jesus in appearance of host will be received. When we take part in the communion, God’s love and blessing are poured upon us. We make God’s sanctuary inside our body. Don’t you remember Saint Paul’s word, “You are the temple of the Holy Spirit?” By eating the bread, God transforms our heart to be like Him. He changes us to be more like Him, remember the story in Genesis that God made us with his own image. We are the image of God and to make it even more we need to receive the real image through Eucharist. Father Gerard shared with us that our body had expiry date and it is seven days. Hence we need to be “relived” every week. Eucharist is the source of power, strength, joy, peace, and love. Where on earth can you find celebration which unites heaven and earth and God’s presence is made real?

2. Bible reading and reflection

Having received the body of Christ alone is not enough. There is old saying, “Know someone from his words.” Listening to God’s word make us become closer to Him, the speaker. Remember what Tommy said about listening to God. One way is to listen to God through his bible where the writer recorded His word to us. In Old Testament, Yahweh was speaking to His people, Israel, through the prophets. In New Testament, God was speaking through His son, Jesus. In fact, Jesus himself is words of God that made flesh. See the connection, to understand God, know God, and fall in love, we do need to listen to Him. After this we need to bring it to higher level, proclaiming the words of God. Jesus told his disciples to bring and spread the good news to the end of the world. We, in fact, are responsible to this task. Reflection helps us to relate and make the bible to daily practice. Hence the word is not just on the lips but also put in action. Do you remember the meaning of three crosses we make before the Gospel reading?

3. Prayer life

After listening to Him, we also want to talk back to Him. In every communication, it is a two ways communication that is effective to build relationship with someone. We don’t want just to listen but we also want to speak up. We want to have conversation with Him. How do we do that? The answer is through prayer. Prayer is one way to have conversation with God. It’s free, 24/7, anywhere, and not complicated. You don’t need anything, basically, just a heart and love to him. Even you don’t need a word in your prayer. Don’t you believe me?

4. Confession

Yes, we have good relationship now with God. We receive Him through Eucharist. We listen to him through bible. We have conversation with Him through prayer. Everything looks perfect, complete, and nice. What is lacking? In relationship, sometimes, or maybe most of times, we make mistake that hurt our partner. We don’t intend to do it but it happened. Then we apologize for it and promise that we’ll never do that again in future. Same story happens with our God. What is our mistake? SIN. Sin huts our God. It makes Him upset, sad, and angry, He fells betrayal from His beloved. Because of this we need to say sorry to Him. But it’s not enough, we need to change our life. Hence confession leads us to conversion. Conversion is moving forward to God’s face while leaving the sin behind. Pope John Paul II called for the universal conversion. Pope Benedict XVI called for whole Church conversion. In his homily, Pope Benedict said,

“We are not alone in this spiritual itinerary," Pope Benedict clarified, "because the Church accompanies and sustains us from the start with the Word of God, which encloses a program of spiritual life and penitential commitment, and with the grace of the sacraments.”

5. Devotion to Mother Mary

To know a person is through his friends. Friends and families are the one who know us the best. It is the same with our Lord. His friends and families are the one who know Him the best. Mother Mary knows Him very well. After all, she is His mother. Hence the devotion to our mother should bring us closer to our Lord, Jesus Christ. According to Legion of Mary handbook, a true devotion to our Mother will lead us to her son, Jesus Christ. Who are Jesus’ friends then? Saints who have done His will throughout the ages are His best friend. We can know Jesus from them, their life, action, charity, love, and activity. All of them resemble Jesus’ love to them. We need to learn and do it on our own. Pope John Paul II told the youth that everyone can be saint, are called to be saint. Pursue your own holiness.

From the explanation above you can see the connection between each other. We can opt to do one or worse do nothing. It will go in flow and continuously. And it doesn’t matter if you are core team or not, if your new to Catholic or not, if your are male or female, if you are young or old. Everyone is called to follow Jesus steps. That’s why we are called the follower of Christ. Remember the fourth point Archbishop Nicholas Chia told us during the Commissioning Mass, for community to be a good community you must have willingness to learn, fellowship, teaching, and reaching out. It’s not just for the community but for us also as individual. We do need these four factors for our growth. Spiritual commitments are the practical fruit. Do you want to be closer to God or you want to be far away from Him? Be careful of Spirituality Anorexia.